A Better Day

What a fabulous Mother's Day. As we know from my previous post, I didn't have the highest of hopes for an easy-going, relaxing day because I was a little... stressed.

But, we had SUCH a great day. Maybe my best Mother's Day yet.

Nana bought me a beautiful necklace that has a picture of Maddie and me on one side and the word Faith on the other. I absolutely love it. Thank you so much Mom (oh, and I have a BUNCH of pictures of our Mother's Day crafts but I haven't wanted to post them because I know the Nana and the Grandma check the blog). :)

After shopping and lunch, we journeyed to the park, which is always a win with Maddie. It's a beautiful day out, too.

Thank you so much for all the texts, calls and emails today. I don't think I've ever received as many texts in a 24 hour period.

How lucky I am to have such amazing friends.

I don't know how good of a job I'm doing with this whole mothering thing, but I know that I love it. I know that it is, by far, the most exhausting and frustrating position I've ever held but it is also, by far, the most heart-warming one.

I love this girl so much.

I have about, oh, three million more pictures, ranging from TT's really awesome sand alligator to Annie-Megan-Maddie pics. I'll post again soon (you know I'm good for it). For now, we're off to settle down for a nap (but tell Maddie that it's just a rest; otherwise she'll totally freak out).

Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day and as odd as might sound, today feels a little, well... bittersweet. Yes, I'm a mother and I'm so thankful and proud to wear that title. In fact, when I was teaching (a job that I really did love), I never felt that it was my calling. I always felt as though there was something bigger out there for me. As soon as I held Maddie in my arms, I knew that this was the bigger calling, the bigger job that I was created to do.

So then, why is it bittersweet?

I guess I feel like Mother's Day goes hand-in-hand with Father's Day and the father is the piece of the equation that is missing from our puzzle.

I remember when I was pregnant (in fact, very pregnant) with Maddie. Mike surprised me with so many gifts on Mother's Day because, even though she was still in my belly, I was a mom. Last year was a little different; there were no cards or presents (in fact, in my cleaning, I recently found the blank card that he bought but never gave me). And then this year, well, this year is the hardest because things just seem to be so over.

It's not the greatest Mother's Day gift to be told that in fact, yes, he will be fighting you in court for custody, despite the promise he made just two weeks ago. It's not the greatest present to go to bed with a knot in your stomach and an ache in your heart.

But then.

But then, I woke up to my sweetheart saying, *"Mama! Where you go Mama?" And upon entering her room, she throws her arms around my neck and asks, "Sunny day?"

*Oh, and it helps that this conversation didn't occur until a little after 8am, which I now consider to be "sleeping in."

Yeah, it's a sunny day and it's sunny because I get to celebrate being a mom.

And I realize that no matter where our lives take us, where we wake up or how old we are, I'll always be her mom and she'll always be my daughter. Nothing can ever change that and I'm so blessed because of it.

So today, I'm going to try really hard to put the yucky stuff aside and celebrate the happiness of today. After all, it is my third Mother's Day and in the words of Maddie, "It's sunny day, Mama!" And coming from the girl that waited 17 months to say, "Mama," that makes me pretty darn happy.

Happy Mother's Day to all our friends out there. And equally, happy Mother's Day to the best Nana and Grandma that Maddie and I could ever ask for.